If you have been raised in the West you have been raised in what I call the Scientistic Paradigm. Science is the ultimate arbitrator of what is real, and only what is scientifically provable can be 'officially' accepted as real. Oh we largely enjoy freedom of religion, you can believe any silly thing you want. But don't rely on the power of God to heal your fevered child, nor tell your co-workers, your pendulum stone talks to you. Not unless you want people to view you as mad.
In truth, we have a de-facto state, no super-state, religion of Agnostic-Scientific Materialism. Its unimaginable that the word of a High Priestess or Padre would be given more weight in our courts than the word of Scientist. Which would be all well and good, if it where true, if the Paradigm in fact described the world, as it truly exists. The problem is that this world view is just riddled with Anomalies. People have been healed by the power of their faith. Recently passed relatives have found ways to say goodbye from across the veil. Gifted Seers, can by the touch of your hand, read your energy. Tell you things about yourself secret even to your spouse. Most of us have encountered one or more of these anomalies in our lives, but as the vast majority only experience a handful of anomalies in a lifetime the prevailing paradigm goes largely unchallenged.
The Tarot is a doorway to life full of Anomalies.
What I generally do is a Celtic Cross Spread, to get your general energy, followed by 3 card or other spreads to get answers to specific Questions.
Before we begin, Let me say if the reading feels on consider it, but if it does not put it aside without fretting it. This is doubly true in your present moment as you are obviously feeling particularly fragile.
Covers .......... 6 of Pents
Your Energy ..... 6 of Wands Rx
........................... Innana chose the Connolly Tarot.
I normally have Innana chose a Tarot deck via my Pendulum, that's not what happened here. Last night not too long after I had read your post, I got up to fetch myself a bit of water. I was thinking about your post, and as if on Queue, the Connolly deck just fell off the shelf. Some times she's subtle, this wasn't one of them. But I said we would help you find your guides. I believe this is an omen in that direction. If you feel the reading is accurate I strongly suggest you invest in a Connolly Tarot. I believe you will find you have a particularly strong connection to this deck. :) BB.
On with the reading. The Core Cards in this reading are the 6 of Pents and the VII of Cups.
This for me is the most important card in the reading. First off we have the unusual event of a deck, falling off the shelf at just the moment I am pondering the reading I am planning to do... 2 it is a deck I seldom use myself, I consider the art of the High Priestess sadly flawed and it spoils an other wise beautiful deck for me. Finally this card is so unusual. Compared to the more typical art of say the Robin Wood. A clear indication that this card is meant to be read from the pictures. Innana is at moments very specific about the art she chooses and this was very clearly one of those moments. Notice the 3 main characters, the Young Man, The woman, and the grim old man facing her. He is the young man's future if she does not pull him out of his cloud of "purpose" and plug him back into living his life.
He definitely would seem to have a message for you, because the card crossing you being the 7 of Cups. speaks to a person who is too caught up in her dreams. I like the vision of this card in the Gendron Tarot best. In that card, the central character is so caught up in gazing at the 3 cups chained to the tree, she completely overlooks the 4 other cups beside the tree. Looking at your core cards this seems to be a point that has been painfully driven home for you recently.
The Seven of Cups on the other hand has nothing in the art that struck me as particularly striking in the moment, for that particular reading. So I referred the Q, to my personal favorite image of the card. Melanie so elegantly captures how easy it is for a person to get so caught up in their desires, they totally overlook their blessings.
Numerology: 6+7=13 Death. This is certainly a difficult core and a difficult moment. The death card resonates with the Archetype of the Sheppard King. Or Innana, those figures who in myth and story, Journey into the realm of the dead, and are reborn. It seems clear, by your spread, you are at the threshold of such a rebirth, but clear the valley of death you will have to make some changes in your mind-space.
Your foundation is the Hierophant. Who represents, our traditions and grounding. So its interesting you sign your email Lost Faith, and he appears inverted. Telling us that much that you had believed in has fallen apart. While your Crown card is Temperance, the balancing of the elements, but also the card of compassion. Learning to look at ourselves and others, with the same eyes. I often find myself advising people to write a letter to themselves, such as you would write your best friend. We often have more compassion, and more realistic expectations for our friends than we allow ourselves.
The Numerology of the Present moment line also speaks to this vision:
3 cards really speak to disappointment in this reading. Ace of Cups Rx, 6 of Wands Rx, Page of Cups Rx. They tell a story by themselves. Of a person who seemed to really have the world come together for her, then as suddenly as everything came together. (6 of Wands) it was all overturned.
On the other side we see the King of Pents as the Rising card. I see him as someone who can help you find a new more balanced dream, than the dream the 7 of cups speaks too.
Your best energy is represented by the 6 of Wands Rx (Victory), which reminds us of the 6 of Pents covering you. Your best energy to take a step back from the world. To take a step back from competing/ winning loosing, and take some time to give something back to the world. Find away to step outside yourself, and give something back to others for awhile.
I believe you will have others around you who will make this more difficult. I see the Page of Cups, Rx, as advise that will point you towards the past, and the cups energy we see spilled out in the spread. Your own heart will tell you however the time has come to engage in some inner work. (High Priestess.) While the outcome is the world. The most positive outcome one could have in a spread.
Numerology of the Staff: 21+6+11+2=40 The Number of completion.
I know this reply has been VERY symbolic. The Tarot is by its nature symbolic, but this really has been a particularly symbolic reading. Yet in the end now that we have had a closer look at the individual cards and lines. The overall message is quite clear.
You have reached a moment of your life where your old framework, your old dreams no longer serve you, and you need another. That dream it seems needs to embrace giving back to others. In that dream you will be reborn. I really see here a moment to burn some bridges.
I am including a link to the 7 of Cups in the Gendron Tarot.
I do suggest you have a good long look at it, and honestly ask yourself, if you see yourself in this card. This has been quite a long post, so I will wait on your reply. If however, you decide you would like to pick up a Connelly Tarot, and would like some advise on good books to get you started with the Tarot, and good starting exercises. I would be happy to provide some guidance. One thing I would suggest is to draw a card, face down, each morning. And come back to it shortly before bed each night. Ask yourself, if and how, the energy of that card played out in your day. I know a lot of books suggest you just draw a card each morning, but if you draw a negative card, it can be very distracting waiting for the challenge represented by that card to manifest through the rest of the day. And we all have enough stress.
The Q's reply was very nice. She was quite happy with the reading, but privacy dictates I minimize what I quote here. The Q it turns out has quite a strong Psychic gift, but without the support of other gifted people she was floundering. ...
It "just so happens" that I had only days before met the perfect person to serve as a guide and mentor for the Q. I arranged for them to exchange posts, and they have hit it off quite well. So you might say I introduced her, unknowingly to the "King" of Pents. Who is a woman. She is however a strong, quite capable, craftsman and business woman, and the king very largely fits her wonderful and outgoing energy. I know my lady intended for me to do this, the synchronicity was too strong for it to be otherwise. Like I said at the start, a life filled with anomalies. :)
Ama tu ANKI, BB.